Dear friends,
This note is to give you an idea about my mindset regarding
the story.
1.
First of all, I neither support nor am I against
extra-marital affairs. That is not the purpose of this story. My opinion is
that, these are personal matters. We don’t know why a man or woman in a marriage
is going out in search of love or whatever! That is their personal issue. We
can’t judge them because we don’t know how their life is. You can’t say this is
right or this is wrong.
2.
Only when you are in the position of Lavanya or
Kushi, you can fully understand them. But even then, when we are part of such
an affair or when our spouse is part of it, we won’t be clear of what is right
and wrong. It is complicated.
3.
When I am writing this story, I put myself in
Kushi’s and Lavanya’s shoes and write. What will I feel if I fall in love with
a Lavanya’s Arnav? What will I feel if my Arnav is in love with some Kushi?
What will I do? Trust me; it is not easy to stand in both shoes.
4.
If you have noticed, in most stories regarding
this theme, only one side will be concentrated; that is either the female
protagonist will be the wife character or the other woman. Initially, I was
planning to keep Lavanya a closed character too. But then I changed that
decision because I wanted a different approach. For me this story is a quest to
understand some innate nature of relationships and family values.
5.
My initial and sole purpose of this story was to
speak for the ‘other woman’ in this triangle equation. Often the men fall for
another woman and later they regret and go back to their wives for their
children or out of guilt. Who is left behind with nothing is the other girl!
And the society will make her life hell. Some of you might say, she deserves
it. Yes, but doesn’t that male too deserve it? In fact more? In my view, no
wife will be hurt if another woman is after her husband. It hurts her when her
husband strays. So why is the husband, who did a more sin is left scot free?
So, my aim is to talk for that woman. If I can change at least one of your
perspectives’ regarding such a woman, I have attained my goal.
6.
Some of you had often asked me for a monologue
of Arnav. Let me make this clear, I am not sure if I will ever post a monologue
of his. It is because; I don’t know how a man thinks. I am a woman and I can
only put myself in the shoes of another woman, not a man. If I give his
monologue, it will be artificial. I don’t want that. I’m trying my best to
bring originality into this work. So you will know and understand Arnav through
his actions, as a third person can see. His inner thoughts will be a mystery,
always!
7.
I am happy that some of you are feeling very
intensely for Lavanya. Since this is an Arshi story, I was afraid if people
will ever realise what Lavanya goes through!
8.
And sometimes it is a fact that people don’t
find happiness in their marriage. Either the marriage would be arranged and the
couple doesn’t find love in each other or they loved before marriage but after
marriage they understand they can’t stay together and many such reasons. I love
the question Rani asks initially to Sharukh in the beginning of KANK – “What if I get my true love after
marriage????” Have you thought of it? What if in later life you don’t find
happiness in your marriage, you adjust to it. But what if you FIND real love
elsewhere? Not that always such affairs will be true; there can be cheats and
people who take advantage of the situation too. But at times, like Maya and Dev
some find another person out of marriage with whom they find solace! I don’t
know if it is not right or wrong. But the least I could do is not ‘judge’.
9.
And lastly, some of you say La is wrong to cling
on, some say Kushi is wrong to break a woman’s marriage to gain her love. Both
are right in a way. But for me, some asked my opinion personally, so, for me
Arnav is wrong and right, Kushi is wrong and rightand Lavanya is wrong and
right. Y?
10.
Arnav is wrong because, deal or not he is in a
bond and is responsible for this whole chaos in three lives. Kushi is wrong
because she know there might not be a future for this affair but still went
ahead for temporary happiness. La because she didn’t work on her marriage
early. Instead of giving him space, she should have tried to concretize the
foundation of her marriage. But you can’t blame any of them too.
Arnav, as said above, found true love in
Kushi not in Lavanya. He didn’t feel the way he feels for Kushi for La. He didn’t
try to cheat La by having an affair or disrespect Kushi by asking her to be his
mistress or to keep this relationship hidden. He took the correct steps of
informing La, arranging for divorce, standing up for Kushi and facing
everything together though he is questioned less! Kushi tried her best to
resist her urges and desire for this man. She even went to the point of hurting
him and herself. She denied herself even the friendship she had with him. She
tried her best to move away but her love finally caught up with her making her
selfish to live at least for a day with her love. La too had no one to teach
her the basics of a relationship or how to work on it when she fell in love
with Arnav. Seeing her parents’ example she thought she might not push him but
wait! So each one of them are right and wrong. But that is how every deed of
human beings is. A deed loved by some people will be hated by another. That is
part and parcel of the world!
So that is all I have to say. I know all of
you are waiting for updates. I hope this weekend I will be able to update both.
Not sure, but as pooja holidays are there, I hope I will post at least one for
sure.
